My review at work was yesterday. There were 5 other people that were receiving a review in front of me. I was last. I spent the entire day agonizing over how it was going to go even though I have never had a bad review my anxiety gets the best of me. So, I had two pages of things I wanted to discuss with my superior in the event it did not go as expected. I discussed with a couple of close coworkers my concerns to confirm I wasn’t being unreasonable which it did not seem I was. And I mustered up and prayed for the courage and strength to be honest and cover all the items I wrote down.
Finally, it was my turn about 40 minutes before the 5 o’clock rush on Friday but I didn’t care how long it was going to take to go over everything I deserved my time. I grabbed my note pad, held my head up high and walked in. He began joking around and the mood was light. My anxiety began to melt. I was determined to ask for a large raise (which I have never done in my life) and it all went away once we started discussing my work the past year and gave me the terms and projections of the future which were more than I was going to ask for.
Thankfully God stayed with me as I began to discuss suggestions and concerns with our office as a whole. There are certain individuals that no matter how hard you try can make for a very negative work environment. Those same people are the ones that I allowed to get inside my head and what led me to believe I deserved a raise.
Before my meeting while I was praying I received an answer. Everything you do, you do for the Lord. So, what you receive for your work, isn’t yours. It is the Lords. Which brought over a peace that humbled me. I don’t deserve anything. I am a sinner. I am human. I go to work not only to provide for my family but to spread Gods word. This is easily forgotten in the hustle and bustle.
When I walked out of my superiors office I praise God. The entire way home, I just kept thanking Him. My composure was maintained throughout the meeting, I voiced many concerns in a manner I thought was hopefully pleasing to God. And I didn’t have to ask for anything. It was provided. Not by me.
With all of this being said it is easy to forget that things are out of our control, that God will provide, and that all we do should be done in His name not for our benefit. Thank God He does not give us what we deserve.
Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
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